31 March 2010

Beauty and the Bitch

Things surely do change in six years.  It seems as though Kate G was probably awesome as an ogre back in 2004--humble, modest, full of love for her family and husband...but the prettier (I use that term loosely and only to compare her now to what she used to look like) and more famous she got, the uglier her personality became.
  
She may have looked like an ogre in 2004, but in 2010 her personality is truly the monster.

It's really no wonder why Jon cheated on her. I would have too if I was put down constantly and figuratively castrated on national TV.  Not that I condone cheating, but when your looks change for the better but your personality changes for the worse, you suck at life.

And BTW, you're not a good dancer. Not one bit.

17 March 2010

The Anti-Gay States of America

Constance McMillen wants nothing more than to attend her senior prom with her date at Itawamba Agricultural High School in Mississippi...but there is one hang up.

She wants to wear a tuxedo and Constance wants to attend her senior prom with the person she loves.  She doesn't see a problem with it, do you?  If everyone else could bring their significant others, why couldn't she?

The school district thought otherwise.  Instead of having an open mind, last week officials circulated fliers that said students could not bring same sex dates.

Luckily, the ACLU has gotten involved.  When McMillen and a lawyer from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) gave the school district a deadline to rescind the ruling, the school board on Wednesday voted to cancel the prom rather than abide by McMillen’s wish.

I want to know what harm it will do to the school district, teachers, students, and the community if Constance wants to bring a same-sex date.  Really? We're not past this yet?  This is just the thing the South needs to end deep rooted prejudice in that area of the country.  More liberal places like Los Angeles and Miami, students are allowed to bring same sex dates.  Prom should be universal.  To me, it's a school dance where people bring dates, dance, and have a blast.  So because a student is gay, she shouldn't be allowed to participate in something so significant to a high school student as a prom?  What is wrong with The "United" States of America where a school district refuses to allow this?

The school district should crack down more threatening issues like drugs, weapons, hate crimes, bullying, hazing, etc., instead of wasting it's time on prejudice against a gay student.  How many school shooters are gay? How many bullies are gay?  How many gay students are violent?  My guess--very few.  How many straight students are bullies, violent, druggies, and worse? My guess--more than we'd care to imagine.

Being gay is not a crime.  Being prejudiced is.

I wonder how many people in the school district and how many teachers and parents involved in this prejudiced decision have Melissa Etheridge on their iPods and sing along, or how many of them DVR "Ellen" on a regular basis and laugh...or how many of them watch and enjoy "Will and Grace" reruns on TV. If the same people involved in this decision are guilty of the above, then they are hypocrites.

The Christian Science Monitor explained that on Thursday, the ACLU filed a lawsuit in US district court, charging that school officials violated McMillen's free speech rights when they told her they would enforce the district's policy requiring prom dates to be of the opposite sex.

The message this sends to the future generations of this country is instead of allowing a gay couple attend a prom, everyone gets punished by having the school district cancel the prom.  How is it fair for anyone?  Why are people so upset if there is a same-sex couple at the prom? Don't these people think that the two women they see shopping together in the grocery store could be lesbians?  Or a respected male doctor or lawyer has a boyfriend?

Because the school district canceled the prom on account of a same-sex couple, Constance fears for retailiation from her fellow students and is afraid to go back to school.  Students may be angry that they don't get to attend their prom because of her--but the real issue is they aren't allowed to attend the prom because the school district is prejudiced.  It's a shame that someone who stands up for what she believes in is afraid of retaliation and could be a victim of a hate crime.  I think she should be praised and commended for her bravery and willingness to put herself under such scrutiny just to attend a high school prom.

According to CNN.com, "I never thought the school would try to cancel the prom and hurt everyone just to keep me and my girlfriend from going together," McMillen said in an ACLU news release. "A lot of people have made really generous offers to pay for a prom somewhere else, which I really appreciate. But all I've ever wanted was to be able to just go to my own school's prom with my girlfriend."

Also, according to The Christian Science Monitor, when McMillen expressed a desire to wear a tuxedo to the prom, the district superintendent told her only male students were allowed to wear them, according to court documents.  Superintendent Teresa McNeece also told McMillen that she and her girlfriend could be ejected from the prom if other students complained about their presence, according to the documents.

I cannot commend this brave young woman enough for standing up for what she believes in and for who she is. If anyone should be prohibited from going to prom are the prom crashers, or kids who do drugs or are prone to violent behavior.  But no, no one stops them.  As long as they bring an opposite sex date, they're invited right in.  

I am ashamed of my fellow Americans.  This is 2010.  This is the time to start accepting gay people into society because we're not going anywhere.  Just because I choose to live my life with another woman, and love a woman instead of a man, does not make me any less human, any less American, or any less entitled to the same rights as everyone else.  The same for this 18-year old young woman and any other person who chooses a same sex partner.

I have an amazing girlfriend myself.  One day, I hope to marry her because we really have an great life together.  I can't imagine being with anyone else and I'm lucky as hell to have her.  Shouldn't that take priority over the fact that we're a same sex couple?  Shouldn't people who genuinely care about each other and are honest and fair and contribute to the betterment of society be accepted? We're accepted some places, in some states, but for a country that was based on unity, it sure as hell feels more divided than ever.

If the school district had just given this couple a chance to attend the prom and taken a chance to see how other students reacted, maybe they would have learned a thing or two.  Maybe there would have been retaliation or maybe some kids would have reacted with insulting words and actions.  But maybe, just maybe, this is what a conservative Southern school needs--to push for change and expect the best.  If you never try, nothing will ever be accomplished.

So for you Constance, high school prom is a big deal now, but standing up for yourself and your rights will always be a big deal.  It's people like you, especially at your age, who push for change and refuse to give up.  It's people like you who confront the prejudiced and hypocrites in this country and demand a fair chance. 

Constance, I hope after all this hard work, you actually get the opportunity to enjoy your senior prom.  And I hope you look beautiful in your tuxedo.

**McMillen image courtesy of The Christian Science Monitor**

10 March 2010

Jazzy Jeans

Who knew a pair of jeans could create a strange, yet intriguing phenomenon?  But what jeans could have such an effect on the world?

Mom Jeans, that's what. And when women (and sometimes men) wear Mom Jeans, it creates a phenomenon called "Mom Butt", which resembles an upside down heart shape in the rear.

"Mom Butt" occurs when women, usually over the age of 35, wear unflattering jeans, such brands as Lee and Rider (basically anything found at KMart).  These jeans are usually short and/or tapered, showing the ankle (cankle in some cases), occasionally come without rear pockets, and sometimes even feature pleats, surrounding the crotch area.  Perhaps the most flattering result of wearing Mom Jeans is the camel toe, a direct result of the high waist of the jeans, which rest barely an inch away from the bra line.

I have my suspicions as to why women choose to wear Mom Jeans.  Comfort, some say.  Style, some also say.  Some women wear Mom Jeans to conceal something they don't want the world to see.  Or some women aren't afraid to rock the "Mom Butt"/camel toe combo.

Whatever the reason may be, it seems as though Mom Jeans aren't limited to the normal folk of America.  Even celebrities occasionally rock the Mom Jeans.  Jessica Simpson, for example, isn't afraid to go on stage with a stylish pair of Mom Jeans.  I don't think her goal was style though, judging by the extra weight she put on, thus confirming one of my suspicions as to why women wear Mom Jeans (concealment). Either that or she loves rocking the camel toe. Although she is not a mother, wearing these jeans has directly resulted in her sporting "Mom Butt".

Designed for women, Mom Jeans have crossed over into the men's section of your local clothing store.  It seems as though Mom Jeans have even moved to a new house.  The White House that is.  Michelle Obama is a very physically fit, stylish lady.  Too bad she can't dress her husband as well as she dresses herself.

President Obama has taken a liking to wearing Mom Jeans, resulting in a new, hybrid phenomenon I like to call "Dad Butt".  This is still a new phenomenon so there hasn't been as much research and scientific data about "Dad Butt", but if it's going to start somewhere, where better than with the President?

Even the writers at SNL discovered the "Mom Butt" phenomenon and created a commercial advertising Mom Jeans. This commercial truly captures the unique and jazzy essence of Mom Jeans.



While I understand some women may not have a choice in wearing Mom Jeans--these jeans could be the only jeans they can afford, or they are just destined to be frumpy.  I just want you women to know that you do have a choice in what jeans you wear.  You can wear stylish jeans without pleats.  You can find comfy jeans without a high waist.  And for those of you women who are actually moms wearing Mom Jeans, I have one last thing to say.

Just because you're a Mom doesn't mean you have to wear Mom Jeans.  But if you choose to, beware you have just given yourself to the cultural phenomenon known as "Mom Butt".

08 March 2010

Starving For Attention

I know I've said this before in a previous blog post, so I'll try not to be redundant and change it up.  I always suspected Asians were a bit odd, different, and were addicted to electronics, but this Korean couple definitely took it to a horrifying level.

Meet Kim Yoo-chul, 41, and his partner Choi Mi-sun, 25, a Korean couple from a suburb of Seoul, who recently gave birth to a baby girl...who is now dead (starved to death) because her parents are idiots and are addicted to some stupid MMORPG (massively multiplayer online role playing game). What the acronym should mean: YWNGLIYPTTOG (you will never get laid if you play this type of game!)

This specific MMORPG game is called "Prius online" and it reminds me of the American game, "The Sims", but in this version it's like anime and the point is to...um, well, I'm not exactly sure what the point is.  Here's what the website says about the game and it's purpose:

1. Emotional Exchange System:  Anima may seem to find it hard to express her feelings at first. Let her engage in various emotional experiences with you - you’ll notice her growth and she’ll start to show her feelings to you in return. Make no mistake - your Anima is not a passive unit that simply tags along with you and follow your orders. She is your companion with her own intentions who knows how to express her feelings.

2. Your Companion Anima: You get to meet Anima like you meet your soul mate once you start adjusting yourself to the new world. You and Anima will soon reach that quiescent place where the star tree stands through heart-pounding connection with each other. It is like a fated karma that began to revive from the distant memory of eternity.


3. Emotional Awakening System: You get to meet Anima when she lost her memory and maintains only a vague state of emotions. Nonetheless, she regains her forgotten memories one by one through various experiences you share with her along the journey.


4. Intimate Bonds: The more you sympathize with your Anima, the higher the efficiency becomes for everything she does for you. Higher intimacy allows her to kick off her skills and forces swiftly for you to escape from dangerous moments.

Basically this Korean couple put all their time and effort into raising a virtual child, time and effort that should have been spent raising their real baby!  According to the The Telegraph, this couple only fed their actual 3-month old child in between 12-hour sessions of playing this game at a neighborhood internet cafe, where they were "raising" their avatar baby.  Sounds creepy to me.

The article states: "Leaving their real daughter at their home in a suburb of Seoul to fend for herself, the pair, who were unemployed, spent hours role-playing in the virtual reality game, which allows users to choose a career and friends, granting them offspring as a reward for passing a certain level.  The pair became obsessed with nurturing their virtual daughter, called Anima, but neglected their real daughter, who was not named".

In September, the couple returned home from a 12-hour session to find their real child dead.  The autopsy said the baby died from prolonged malnutrition.  My question is, what is the parents' punishment going to be? I think someone should starve them to death for doing this to an innocent child all in the name of a stupid video game!

This couple found out the hard way what video games can really do to people, families, and relationships.  I know other people and couples who struggle with the issue of spending too much time playing a video game, but I've never heard of anyone actually neglecting their own child for a virtual child.  Maybe neglecting another family member for a few hours while playing a video game, sure, but not to this extent where someone dies because of it.

Chung Jin-won, a police officer in Suwon, the Seoul suburb, gave this statement to a news agency: "The couple seemed to have lost their will to live a normal life, because they didn't have jobs and gave birth to a premature baby".  Um, is that a fact or are you making an assumption because you don't want to believe that people are capable of something this tragic and stupid?

I don't think they lost the will to live; clearly, they could get up and get ready for the internet cafe and had the will to live to take care of their avatar child.  And they didn't have jobs because they spent 12 hours at the internet cafe!  I think that's an excuse to cover their own asses.  But what does this baby being a premature baby have to do with anything?  


I have to admit, I personally enjoy playing video games. I have a PS2, a Nintendo Wii, and a PSP.  But my gameplay is under control. My relationships aren't neglected, nor do I waste an entire day playing a game.  There's more to life than a virtual world.


But for those of you people out there who have the tendency to get obsessed with games, or if you are feeling lonely and need to find a companion, check out the Prius game website and take care of your own anime child.  Just don't neglect your own child or other relationships because of it! No one should die because you were too addicted to a video game.

See also: "Cyber Marriage". Weird how these two blog posts intertwine so well together.

05 March 2010

Dancing With The Stars No One Cares About Anymore

There are several shows on TV I literally cannot stand; some of these shows I've even refused to watch because I know I'll hate them immediately and regret wasting precious moments of my life tuned in to these atrocities.

Anything on MTV falls in this category. I've boycotted MTV since 1999 since they stopped playing Music on TV. Change your acronym to RTV (Reality TV). Laguna Beach, The Hills, and Jersey Shore used to be locations in the United States, but somehow they've ended up being popular TV shows. WHY?!?!?!?

There are some reality shows I like watching, although they're not really "reality". I like The Biggest Loser, American Idol, and So You Think You Can Dance, but I think these are more competition shows than "reality" anyway.

But one reality/competition show I literally hate is Dancing With The Stars.  Whose bright idea was it to gather professional dancers and pair them with C-list and D-list so called celebrities and vote on their dancing? WTF??? 

I don't understand the reason this show is on TV.  American Idol--contestants are required to have raw talent and it's an opportunity to showcase themselves as musicians.  Same with SYTYCD--contestants also need to have raw talent.  Biggest Loser--contestants struggle to change their bodies by changing their attitudes, and it's both inspirational and heartwarming.

But what is the purpose of DWTS? I think it's an opportunity for those celebs who are recently caught in scandals to clear their name by learning the Fox Trot and the Samba as a distraction so we forget their douchebag factor and say "hey, maybe they're not so bad...I mean, she really rocked the socks off that contemporary routine".

This past week, ABC released it's celeb lineup.  Get ready for it. When I read it, I knew for sure the world was ending; it's a sign, just like the earthquakes that have been shaking our world lately.



Here are a couple noteworthy celebrities has-beens/cougars who will grace the DWTS stage in 2010:




1. Pamela Anderson: Why is she famous again? Baywatch? Kid Rock? She's so irrelevant, I can't even remember.  What I do know is that she needs to be counted as three contestants because her pair of twins could do the Cha Cha all on their own. 

2. Kate Gosselin: Again...why is she famous? If her skills on the dance floor are as good as her mother/wife skills, viewers are in for a real treat. I wonder if anyone informed Kate that she would have to dance and not just sit on a yellow chair in front of the camera. I'm hoping Pam Anderson will pull a Tonya Harding and take Gosselin out by pulling on her hair extensions and punching her in the babymaker.

3. Shannen Dougherty: Wow.  This former Beverly Hills brat, charming witch, and Made-For-TV film star will surely bring something to the show--drama, STD, or police with a warrant...my guess is a nice combo of each.  She, Pam, and Kate will at least have something in common.

My predictions for this show:
1. Pam's implants will pop during a lift in a routine.
2. Kate's weave will strangle her while she shakes her Mom Butt.
3. Shannen will put a Charmed spell on the judges and take the gold.


01 March 2010

I Love You Means Shit To Me

Nothing says "I Love You" like a pile of shit...even better, when it's actually written with piles of shit.

A farmer in Iowa wanted his wife to know he was thinking about her on her birthday, and the best way for him to express himself was with shit.

I've been known to do that back in my glory days, parading around the house as a toddler, but I at least kept it in my diaper..and stopped when I got my big girl panties.

This farmer, Dick Kleis, used 120,000 pounds of manure to basically write out "HAP B DAY LUV U" in the snow to show his affection for his wife.

He said it only took about three hours to write the shitty message, and even said it's not very difficult to do.  His expert advice to those of you wanting to write your beloved a message with shit, particularly in the snow: "Any manure will work but the good, soft, gushy, warm stuff works the best. It kind of melts the snow."

Wouldn't you think a farmer in rural Iowa would have thought to use bales of hay to convey his message or take a lesson from graffiti artists and use spray paint instead of using 60 tons of shit to say "I Love You"?

According to his wife, she says although it's a little weird, she still says he "dung good" when asked if she got the perfect birthday present.  I say he's a dungass.

Dick Kleis wasn't the only person with this shitty idea though.  Another farmer in Minnesota, Bruce Andersland, showed his affection for his wife on Valentine's Day by creating a heart shaped pile of poop...with an arrow through it.

Bruce's wife said it was the largest valentine she had ever received.  No kidding. It's a field covered in heart shaped poop.  Apparently, Bruce had the idea because the square mile, snow covered field seemed fitting for something.

Um, a poop shaped heart was the only thing you could think of to utilize this land? How about farming it? No, I get it...playing with shit is always more fun.

If anyone wrote me a message in shit, piss, blood, semen, or any other bodily fluid, that person would be dead to me.


 
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