20 October 2009

Illegal Aliens

With the quick approach of Halloween, many people are scrambling to find the perfect Halloween costume.  This year, people may choose to dress up as Bella and Edward from "Twilight", in fact, I'm sure most high school couples will do just that.

Since vampires seem to be gaining popularity once again, another popular costume idea this year is "Barakula", a cross between our President and a vampire.  Don't quote me on it, but I'm pretty sure somewhere out there in the internet world is a rock musical called "Barakula" where Barack fights off vampires.

If you really want to frighten people, I suggest purchasing a mask from Ogawa Rubber, Japan's top rubber mask maker, preferably in the form of the late, great, Michael Jackson.  Even better, it comes in two different colors, black and white, which is weird considering M.J. himself always said it didn't matter.

The funniest costumes of the year also happen to be the most controversial.  If I were still into dressing up and going out, I would totally pick one of these as my costume of choice...well, maybe not in South Florida because I, as an American, am actually a minority and would probably get shanked for wearing it, but I would migrate North to don this costume, or buy it for one of my friends North of the Mason-Dixon line.

Introducing, the "Illegal Alien" costumes.  According to CNN.com, the costume includes an orange jumpsuit, similar to prison garb, with "Illegal Alien" stamped in black across the chest; a space alien mask; and a fake Green Card.  Apparently there are two costumes; this one and another costume that includes a space alien mask, this time with a dark handlebar mustache and a baseball cap.

Maybe I'm an asshole; maybe I'm prejudiced; or maybe I'm one of the many Americans who are tired of illegal immigrants receiving better health care and other benefits than my family and I do, but I find this costume absolutely hilarious and find it to be the perfect mix of satire and Halloween!!!  The Coalition for Humane Immigrant Rights of Los Angeles, however, does not share my sentiment.  They started receiving emails Friday morning, which CHIRLA wrote several letters to stores like Target, Walgreens, and Amazon.com, asking them to stop selling the costumes.

Apparently, illegal immigrants everywhere are "offended" that these costumes are a direct attack on illegal immigrants, meaning, how dare we Americans make such a costume? Who the hell do we think we are, right?  Yes, illegal immigrants are humans and have feelings but they are not Americans!  WE Americans have the right to make whatever kind of costume we want, and should not have to worry about people who cross our border ILLEGALLY getting their little feelings hurt.  If you come here illegally, you better learn our customs, speak our language, or your opinion simply does not matter.  That's harsh, yes, but it's the truth.  If I were to go to Laos, Germany, or Haiti, no one would care if my feelings were hurt...no one would listen to me if I didn't at least attempt to learn the language.  And most of all, no one would welcome me with open arms, like we do here in America!!!

You know when my feelings get hurt in my own country? When I can't afford health insurance, and the gov't cares more about the people who come here illegally than they do about me. I was born here; I deserve health care.  You were born in another country; you deserve health care in your OWN country.   If you want to come to this country, do it legally. I don't enter YOUR country illegally, blatantly ignoring signs like this, and then get offended when you make fun of me and other Americans.  It's a two way street mi amigo...you can't dish it out and then refuse to spoon it back in.

One more thing, last time I checked, it was okay for illegal immigrants to dress and act like us, but we can't dress and act like them?  I mean, if this picture doesn't depict immigrants posing like Americans, I don't know what picture does. We're just trying to blend into the American population, just like you.


Dave "Loose Cannon" Wills said...

Wow. This is so funny. Those costumes are hilarious. And the last picture with the posers.

I love how you use comedy to highlight a serious matter and have people laughing yet contemplating.

Great writing! Keep it up...

CA_Girl said...

I'm not laughing. At all.

I'm still scratching my head at a few of your points. First--the whole premise seems kind of heartless. Like, I know it's a royal pain in the ass to be sensitive and considerate for the feelings of disadvantaged groups, but isn't NOT being an asshole its own reward? I'm kind of missing the whole "I would get made fun of in Laos, so it's okay to make fun of other people" analogy. Do you really want to go there? Is that really how you advocate we base our behavior? Rise above, Kara! You're better than that.

Secondly, I know the whole "illegal immigrant/health care" meme has been tossed around, but I'm yet to see any statistics showing that undocumented immigrants are as much a scourge to our current health care system as you claim. Your point would be much more effective if, instead of blaming illegal immigrants for receiving health care, (which, without sourcing this claim, is kind of ridiculous) why don't you take it one step further and blame the health care companies for making health care inaccessible for MOST people--illegal or not? Because, again, you're coming across as an asshole when you're actually on the verge of making sense. Are you saying that illegal immigrant children shouldn't have access to immunizations, for example? Or tuberculosis testing? Are you familiar with the concept of a "public health crisis?"

Lastly, let me just make sure you understand that people come here illegally because their lives suck elsewhere. Their lives suck so hard that they risk death, incarceration, and family separation to escape. Educate yourself before talking about serious topics that you obviously don't understand, because if you had ANY understanding whatsoever, you'd display empathy instead of flippant, douchebaggy "humor."

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