A Friendly Message From Your Local Toilet Seat

Back in August, I had the pleasant experience of using a toilet with someone else's shit all over it!!! No, I don't work in a hospital, nursing home, group home, or have children. I work in a professional office building, with people who apparently don't know how to wipe, clean up when they make a mess, or even wash their hands. I wrote a friendly letter to the culprit(s), and here's what it said:

8/5

Dr. Mr. or Mrs. SHIT SMEARER,

Thank you for taking a SHIT in here today, around 1pm (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE), and proceeding to SMEAR it all over me.

You are DISGUSTING and INCONSIDERATE to other people who use this bathroom!!! How old are you??? There's no excuse! Clean up after yourself if you make a mess like a three year old in a diaper!!!!!!!

You have to stand up and face the toilet in order to flush it, and you didn't see your own feces smeared on the toilet???

I have been in group homes with people who have developmental disabilities, and even THEY knew enough to wipe the seat if they smeared shit on it!!! And their IQ's were no higher than 68!!!

So, thank you for making my day, as well as other patrons of this restroom, that much better, where I saw someone go back to their office, grab Clorox bleach wipes and gloves, and disinfect me before said person could use me!!!

I still feel like I have your SHIT all over me! How would you like it if I crapped on you and didn't clean it up?

Next time, clean up your own SHIT so no one else has to...or you never know, someone may come crap on you!


LOVE,
THE TOILET SEAT